I am the worst in the world about leaving things in my pockets….SERIOUSLY! I one time found $89 in a coat pocket that I had not worn in over a year! Who does this? OK so first off, let JUST me say…that was an EPIC day and I was so excited that I may or may not have ran down the hall at my school jumping and screaming and causing such a scene that all the other teachers came running out of their rooms to see who was being taken against their will! Secondly…WHO DOES THIS?
Well this morning I reached in my pocket and found a guitar pick…which I find in almost every single pants, jacket, sweatshirt pocket that I put on so not a new discovery, but this morning I found it just when I needed to! I held the little blue piece of plastic in my hand and immediately started smiling. The feel of that little piece of plastic between my fingers is so comforting to me…it feels so good and the idea that I am able to make music with it still totally catches me off guard! See I am not a lifetime musician that hails from a long family lineage of musicians. I have some people in my family that can play a little, one aunt plays piano, my cousin taught himself to play guitar and is an incredible musician but he was self taught and started when we were young….my dad told me that all of his family (my great great relatives) played and sang, but he never told me that until after I started playing. So you see to learn to play and sing and find out its your passion at the age of 30 was quite a surprise!
I realized at that moment that my dad had everything in the world to do with me learning to play! I would have never even thought to try if he had not wanted to learn 5 years ago! In addition to this, if not for my church and for Dana Ammons, I would have never even had the opportunity! See Dana is the most amazingly talented man I know! He felt God’s calling to teach people to play, he told us when we started that he was NOT a teacher and that he had tried to teach people in the past and it was not his thing….but God was pushing him to do it so he was going to do a give a round of guitar lessons, once a week at our church…for FREE, just come and learn! My dad was just out of the hospital and really wanted to try so I asked Jason if I could use the guitar that his best friend Jamie (also one of the most important spiritual influences in Jason’s life to date) had given him as a wedding gift. He said sure, so here we went…my dad and Brad’s guitar, me and Jason’s guitar (a beautiful sounding Alvarez) off to church to learn to play the guitar from the “NOT A TEACHER”…teacher! It was hard, but I was immediately hooked….hopelessly so! I could not explain it, but it took over my thoughts, and according to Jason, my house keeping skills, which were already limited! I learned, quickly, strangely so quickly that soon enough, Dana caught me singing under my breath and made me sing for the group when we would try and learn a new song. It wasn’t good but it was all we had so I just kept doing it….before you know it, we were playing as a group (the guitar lessons class) our first 2 songs on stage for a Sunday morning Service and I was singing one of the songs….WHAT???? It should be noted here that my dad did not stay with the lessons…but I did! During that first song, I had an out of body experience…I like to call it a walking, singing, guitar playing blackout seizure! I was not sure if I even played my guitar…I was TERRIFIED and I am pretty sure it was TERRIBLE, but God filled in the gaps and obviously softened the ears of our members because no one booed, and people actually said I should do it again (maybe God even supplied ear plugs)! That was it, I was hooked! I kept playing, and God kept making me better and better…there is not other earthly explanation! For the past 3 years, God has given me to opportunity to sing and play every Sunday for a room full of people that I love more than words can ever really explain! He has given me the opportunity to tell others about how much He loves us through songs and moments of testimony…What a blessing it has been. What an honor it is to sing for Him to some many wonderful people!
That pick in my hand felt like my dad being next to me this morning….and I really needed my daddy! I miss him so much, all the time in fact! When I get out my guitar, when I sing a song, I can feel him sitting there watching. I can see him smile and I can also hear him telling me how to be better…something that for a long time frustrated me because I just wanted him to be proud and tell me that I did good. Now I would give anything to hear him tell me how to be better! I miss his teaching and his preaching! I miss the way he always knew what needed to be done to fix a horse, to buy a saddle, to sing better, to be a better parent….whatever it was, he could always make it better…or at least give you some really solid advice or something to try!
That pick in my pocket, lost until I needed it! God’s word says
When the righteous cry for help, the Lord hears and delivers them out of all their troubles. The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit. Many are the afflictions of the righteous, but the Lord delivers him out of them all. He keeps all his bones; not one of them is broken. Psalm 34:17-20
What a comfort to my broken heart today! I hope this finds you all feeling blessed, loved, comforted, healed, sealed, and saved!